Woke up this week after the boring international break to the News of Sir Belusconi stepping down(which means more succes for Milan) ,of Mino Raiaola and Braida landing in Brazil,planing to tear the country apart for an attack minded player,Gattuso back in training acting mad as expected,Pato and Nesta also back and Zlatan's Biography on my mind.
We all know Ibra is slightly deranged but how bad his case is can only be judged from reading his biography (not to insightful but highly hilarious).
I shall bootleg some excerpts from chapters of the book that I found interesting for your reading pleasure and to help you make up your minds on getting it.
Excerpts from chapter 1: "1st time Mourinho met my wife, he said to her: Helena, you have only one mission. Feed Zlatan, let him sleep, keep him happy!”
Guardiola constantly repeated himself before the CL-match vs. Inter: "He was like a parrot and I got dodgy vibes from him."
"Playing videogames was a disease to me. When I was at Inter, I would sit up until 4 or 5 a.m, sleep 2-3 hours and then go train."
Chapter2: "After the first Scudetto with Juve, I collapsed in the bathtub. It was Trezeguet, that snake, who lured me into drinking shots."
Ibra tells about stealing bikes: "My brother gave me a BMX bike when I was little. I called it Fido Dido, Fido Dido was a tough little bastard, a cartoon guy with spiky hair ,I thought he was the coolest.But the bike got stolen quickly outside the Rosengård bathhouse and my dad went there, with his shirt open and sleeves rolled up ,He's the kind of guy who says: No one touches my kids! No one steals their stuff! But not even a tough guy like him could do anything about it. Fido Dido was gone, and I was devastated.After that I started stealing bikes. I'd smash the locks. I became great at it. Bang, bang, bang, and the bike was mine.Once I dressed up in all black, and went out into the night like fucking Rambo and got a military bike using a huge bolt cutter and sure, that bike was cool. I loved it. But honestly, it was more the kick I got out of it than the bike itself
It triggered me to sneaking around in the dark, and I'd throw eggs at windows and that kind of stuff. I was only caught sometimes."
"One embarrassing thing happened at the Wessels department store out at Jägersro, for example. But honestly, I deserved it.Me and a friend were wearing huge winter down jackets in the middle of summer - quite fucked up....and under those jackets, we had four table tennis rackets and some other crap we picked up .You guys, aren't you paying for those?", said the guard who caught us. I pulled out a few pennies from my pocket: "With these?But the guy didn't have a sense of humour, so I decided to be more professional from then on."
Chapter 5: Ibra tells about him and his friend pretending to be real cops and scaring off prostitutes and their customers."In Rosengård you don’t brag about a nice apartment or a beach house. You brag about the coolest car and if you want to show that you’ve succeeded in life, you show it with a nice ride, In Rosengård everybody drives, with or without a driver’s license...and when I leased my Toyota Celica, my friends and I went out, and at that time I had calmed down a little. The whole media attention made me behave - at least for a bit- and when my friends started stealing cars and doing stuff like that, I said to them: "It doesn’t work for me anymore. But still, I needed a kick. Like when a friend and I drove up along Industrigatan, where all the prostitutes are.Industrigatan isn’t far away from Rosengård and I had been there as kid when I was up to no good.
we saw a prostitute, who leaned in over a car like she was talking to a customer. "Come on, let’s make fun of this fool", we said So I slammed on the brakes right in front of him, rushed out and shouted: "POLICE! PUT YOUR HANDS UP!" It was totally sick.I used a shampoo bottle as an imaginary gun, and this customer, some old guy, totally freaked out. He hit the gas and disappeared.We didn’t think more about it, it was just the kind of thing that we did. But when we drove a bit further, we started hearing sirens & behind us we saw a police car with same old dude from Industrigatan sitting in it, and we thought: “What’s going on? What is this?And of course, we could have stepped on it and driven off. I was no stranger to that kind of stuff, after all but But we had our seatbelts on and everything and we hadn’t done anything. Therefore, we stopped calmly "It was just for fun", we said. “We pretended to be cops. No big deal, right? We’re sorry”. The cops laughed. It really wasn't a big deal.
Chapter 10: Ibra about his former agent, Carlsson: "He said that Southampton was interested in me, and I was like: "WTF! SOUTHAMPTON?!"
Raiola(ibra's agent) to Ibra, at 1st meeting: "Sell your cars & watches. You have to train 3 times as much now, because your goal ratio sucks!"
Chapter 12: Capello to Ibra during one of his first training sessions at Juve: "I will beat Ajax out of you!"
"Nedved was a workaholic. He would be cycling 1 hour before training. And then after training, he would run for another hour."
Ibra tells about how furious Capello was after a game vs. Liverpool, where Thuram cost a goal, because he changed his man marker "He yelled at Thuram. He kicked the massage bench forcefully and it spun towards us."Everybody was just sitting there, looking at the floor. Trezeguet, Cannavaro, Buffon, everybody. Nobody was moving a muscle, and nobody would ever think of doing something like what Thuram did again.
Chapter 14: Ibra about Mutu: "This guy had partied a lot. The stories he told me! I couldn't stop laughing! It was totally crazy."
Chapter 15: Ibra tells about an argument he had in the summer of 2006 with Didier Deschamps, who was managing Juve back then. We were going to play a friendly match vs. Spezia and I had said that I wasn’t going to play any matches due to the Calciopoli case.Therefore I was sitting in my room playing Playstation. Then Deschamps came up to my room. He was furious Deschamps: "Why are you sitting here? We have to go now." I didn’t say anything. I just stared at him. Deschamps: "Didn’t you hear what I said?". Ibra: "Did YOU not hear what I said? I will train but I won’t play any matches." Deschamps: "You better damn play! You belong to this team! You will get several fines for this!"
Ibra:"Okay".Deschamps: "What okay?" Ibra: "Give me the fines then. I’m staying in this room!" Then he finally left. He was fuming, and I was just sitting there with my Playstation, while the other players went into the bus.I did get the fines. I think it was around €30.000 in total. It became total war.
Chapter. 17: Ibra tells about his addiction to videogames."In November a new game came out. "Gears of War" was the name, I went totally crazy. I locked myself in. I built a playing room and I sat there hour after hour till about 4 a.m.I should sleep so that I wouldn't be totally wrecked during training, but I just continued playing videogames ."Gears of War" and "Call of Duty" were like poison to me. I needed them all the time,I needed them more and more. I couldn't stop & I started playing online with others; English, Italians, Swedes, all sorts of people. I played 6-7 hours a day, and I had a gamertag. I couldn't call myself Zlatan, so of course nobody knew who was hiding behind my tag I impressed everyone, even under a false name. I have been playing video games all my life and I'm an extremely competitive person. I was focused & I crushed them all. But there was this one guy. He was good & he was also online during night His gamertag was "D" and something else. I had heard him talk because we were all wearing headsets when playing, I tried to shut up. I wanted to be anonymous. It wasn't always easy. I had adrenaline in my body and one day they started talking about their cars. D said he had a Porsche 911 Turbo and then I couldn't take it anymore. So I started talking and people noticed. People were suspicious,"you sound like Zlatan", they said. I said "No, no that's not me." Then they asked all sorts of questions, but I dodged them."
"I was about 17 years old. I really studied Ronaldo. His every move and his acceleration we were many who studied Ronaldo, but nobody took it as far as I did. I didn't miss a single detail. Without Ronaldo, I think i would have become a different player. There's a video on youtube of me and Ronaldo, where I'm chewing gum & looking at him, like I can't believe that we're on the same level."
I'll be given u a general review on a new football application and on saturdays wiv fiorentina.
Forza Milan!!
Be kind to one another..
We all know Ibra is slightly deranged but how bad his case is can only be judged from reading his biography (not to insightful but highly hilarious).
I shall bootleg some excerpts from chapters of the book that I found interesting for your reading pleasure and to help you make up your minds on getting it.
Excerpts from chapter 1: "1st time Mourinho met my wife, he said to her: Helena, you have only one mission. Feed Zlatan, let him sleep, keep him happy!”
Guardiola constantly repeated himself before the CL-match vs. Inter: "He was like a parrot and I got dodgy vibes from him."
"Playing videogames was a disease to me. When I was at Inter, I would sit up until 4 or 5 a.m, sleep 2-3 hours and then go train."
Chapter2: "After the first Scudetto with Juve, I collapsed in the bathtub. It was Trezeguet, that snake, who lured me into drinking shots."
Ibra tells about stealing bikes: "My brother gave me a BMX bike when I was little. I called it Fido Dido, Fido Dido was a tough little bastard, a cartoon guy with spiky hair ,I thought he was the coolest.But the bike got stolen quickly outside the Rosengård bathhouse and my dad went there, with his shirt open and sleeves rolled up ,He's the kind of guy who says: No one touches my kids! No one steals their stuff! But not even a tough guy like him could do anything about it. Fido Dido was gone, and I was devastated.After that I started stealing bikes. I'd smash the locks. I became great at it. Bang, bang, bang, and the bike was mine.Once I dressed up in all black, and went out into the night like fucking Rambo and got a military bike using a huge bolt cutter and sure, that bike was cool. I loved it. But honestly, it was more the kick I got out of it than the bike itself
It triggered me to sneaking around in the dark, and I'd throw eggs at windows and that kind of stuff. I was only caught sometimes."
"One embarrassing thing happened at the Wessels department store out at Jägersro, for example. But honestly, I deserved it.Me and a friend were wearing huge winter down jackets in the middle of summer - quite fucked up....and under those jackets, we had four table tennis rackets and some other crap we picked up .You guys, aren't you paying for those?", said the guard who caught us. I pulled out a few pennies from my pocket: "With these?But the guy didn't have a sense of humour, so I decided to be more professional from then on."
Chapter 5: Ibra tells about him and his friend pretending to be real cops and scaring off prostitutes and their customers."In Rosengård you don’t brag about a nice apartment or a beach house. You brag about the coolest car and if you want to show that you’ve succeeded in life, you show it with a nice ride, In Rosengård everybody drives, with or without a driver’s license...and when I leased my Toyota Celica, my friends and I went out, and at that time I had calmed down a little. The whole media attention made me behave - at least for a bit- and when my friends started stealing cars and doing stuff like that, I said to them: "It doesn’t work for me anymore. But still, I needed a kick. Like when a friend and I drove up along Industrigatan, where all the prostitutes are.Industrigatan isn’t far away from Rosengård and I had been there as kid when I was up to no good.
we saw a prostitute, who leaned in over a car like she was talking to a customer. "Come on, let’s make fun of this fool", we said So I slammed on the brakes right in front of him, rushed out and shouted: "POLICE! PUT YOUR HANDS UP!" It was totally sick.I used a shampoo bottle as an imaginary gun, and this customer, some old guy, totally freaked out. He hit the gas and disappeared.We didn’t think more about it, it was just the kind of thing that we did. But when we drove a bit further, we started hearing sirens & behind us we saw a police car with same old dude from Industrigatan sitting in it, and we thought: “What’s going on? What is this?And of course, we could have stepped on it and driven off. I was no stranger to that kind of stuff, after all but But we had our seatbelts on and everything and we hadn’t done anything. Therefore, we stopped calmly "It was just for fun", we said. “We pretended to be cops. No big deal, right? We’re sorry”. The cops laughed. It really wasn't a big deal.
Chapter 10: Ibra about his former agent, Carlsson: "He said that Southampton was interested in me, and I was like: "WTF! SOUTHAMPTON?!"
Raiola(ibra's agent) to Ibra, at 1st meeting: "Sell your cars & watches. You have to train 3 times as much now, because your goal ratio sucks!"
Chapter 12: Capello to Ibra during one of his first training sessions at Juve: "I will beat Ajax out of you!"
"Nedved was a workaholic. He would be cycling 1 hour before training. And then after training, he would run for another hour."
Ibra tells about how furious Capello was after a game vs. Liverpool, where Thuram cost a goal, because he changed his man marker "He yelled at Thuram. He kicked the massage bench forcefully and it spun towards us."Everybody was just sitting there, looking at the floor. Trezeguet, Cannavaro, Buffon, everybody. Nobody was moving a muscle, and nobody would ever think of doing something like what Thuram did again.
Chapter 14: Ibra about Mutu: "This guy had partied a lot. The stories he told me! I couldn't stop laughing! It was totally crazy."
Chapter 15: Ibra tells about an argument he had in the summer of 2006 with Didier Deschamps, who was managing Juve back then. We were going to play a friendly match vs. Spezia and I had said that I wasn’t going to play any matches due to the Calciopoli case.Therefore I was sitting in my room playing Playstation. Then Deschamps came up to my room. He was furious Deschamps: "Why are you sitting here? We have to go now." I didn’t say anything. I just stared at him. Deschamps: "Didn’t you hear what I said?". Ibra: "Did YOU not hear what I said? I will train but I won’t play any matches." Deschamps: "You better damn play! You belong to this team! You will get several fines for this!"
Ibra:"Okay".Deschamps: "What okay?" Ibra: "Give me the fines then. I’m staying in this room!" Then he finally left. He was fuming, and I was just sitting there with my Playstation, while the other players went into the bus.I did get the fines. I think it was around €30.000 in total. It became total war.
Chapter. 17: Ibra tells about his addiction to videogames."In November a new game came out. "Gears of War" was the name, I went totally crazy. I locked myself in. I built a playing room and I sat there hour after hour till about 4 a.m.I should sleep so that I wouldn't be totally wrecked during training, but I just continued playing videogames ."Gears of War" and "Call of Duty" were like poison to me. I needed them all the time,I needed them more and more. I couldn't stop & I started playing online with others; English, Italians, Swedes, all sorts of people. I played 6-7 hours a day, and I had a gamertag. I couldn't call myself Zlatan, so of course nobody knew who was hiding behind my tag I impressed everyone, even under a false name. I have been playing video games all my life and I'm an extremely competitive person. I was focused & I crushed them all. But there was this one guy. He was good & he was also online during night His gamertag was "D" and something else. I had heard him talk because we were all wearing headsets when playing, I tried to shut up. I wanted to be anonymous. It wasn't always easy. I had adrenaline in my body and one day they started talking about their cars. D said he had a Porsche 911 Turbo and then I couldn't take it anymore. So I started talking and people noticed. People were suspicious,"you sound like Zlatan", they said. I said "No, no that's not me." Then they asked all sorts of questions, but I dodged them."
"I was about 17 years old. I really studied Ronaldo. His every move and his acceleration we were many who studied Ronaldo, but nobody took it as far as I did. I didn't miss a single detail. Without Ronaldo, I think i would have become a different player. There's a video on youtube of me and Ronaldo, where I'm chewing gum & looking at him, like I can't believe that we're on the same level."
I'll be given u a general review on a new football application and on saturdays wiv fiorentina.
Forza Milan!!
Be kind to one another..
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